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Lyle Zapato

Detecting UFOs

Lyle Zapato | 2005-07-25.6100 LMT | Paraterrestrials

This is the sort of in-depth, technical information you just don't get in the NWO-controlled media. The Technology Team at India Daily (which operates out of New Jersey) explains how to know if an extraterrestrial [aka paraterrestrial] UFO is in the vicinity:

UFOs use electromagnetic flux for armor at the first level and for stealth at the second level. When the UFO comes out of the wormhole for a very little time it is stealth-less though armor part of the electromagnetic change in field intensity stays. The first signs of an extraterrestrial UFO are unusually high change in electromagnetic field intensity with respect to that of the earth. It is almost like a huge dynamo running and dissipating the energy all over. This is the first indication of an extraterrestrial UFO hovering in the vicinity.

...

If you really want to know if an extraterrestrial UFO is really near you, look at the animals and yourself. It is now scientifically proven that super high intensity of electromagnetic flux makes all living beings depressed. Our living soul is electromagnetic energy and it cannot tolerate an influence of an external very high intensity of electromagnetic flux that is uncontrolled by our soul. So all living beings become depressed and the thinking process gets difficult in the presence of extraterrestrial UFOs. When you find all animals are lethargic and you also feel the same, the possibilities are very high that one or more UFOs are near by.

So there you go. Like miners of yore, carry a canary with you when travelling in areas with known UFO activity. If it starts to show signs of depression -- withdrawal from social interaction, changes in eating or sleeping patterns, alcohol or drug abuse, etc. -- then there is most likely a UFO nearby.

Other helpful UFO tech articles from India Daily:

Lyle Zapato

The New Harvest Begins

Lyle Zapato | 2005-07-10.1530 LMT | Food

"Paper Says Edible Meat Can be Grown in a Lab on Industrial Scale"

The above article is about a research paper discussing the possibility of "cultured meat" as a solution to various problems with the current meat production paradigm. One of the paper's authors has started an organization called New Harvest:

New Harvest is a nonprofit research organization working to develop new meat substitutes, including cultured meat -- meat produced in vitro, in a cell culture, rather than from an animal.

Wide-scale production and sale of cultured meat products through stores is an interesting proposition, if mildly disturbing to some, but the greater potential for creepiness lies in home meat makers, which the article says the paper suggests "may one day sit next to bread makers on the kitchen counter." Presumably these would work by placing a tissue sample and raw nutrients in the machine, turning a knob to "culture", and waiting while the ready-to-grill patties grow. Consumers would probably purchase tissue-nutrient cartridges at the grocery store, but, apart from the possibility of DRM (DNA Rights Management) technology, there would be nothing stopping users from simply saving some of the uneaten meat to be recultured or using alternate sources of tissue.

And what sort of alternate sources will people use? At first they'll try getting samples from unusual or endangered animals. After all, who wouldn't want to try delicacies like California condor nuggets or porpoiseburgers? But getting those samples might prove expensive or legally questionable and home meatgrowers will quickly try other more ready sources, most obviously family pets. (There will be economic incentives to try this: why buy expensive pet food when you can feed Fluffy on himself?)

Eventually though -- and probably sooner than later (and probably as soon as meat makers are available [and certainly since I am about to express the idea as soon as this nested digression ends]) -- someone will hit on the idea of harvesting a tissue sample from themself, just to see what human meat taste like. (The New Harvest site seems to be subliminally promoting this idea, as one of their header images features a woman gnawing on her own hand.)

The moral and ethical questions raised will be murky. Traditionally, those who oppose cannibalism could justify their position on the solid ground that human meat would always be the result of either murder or some sort of desecration of someone's remains. However, those arguments either don't apply to selfcultured meat or the application would be tortuous and unconvincing to many. Libertarian pro-cannibalists will argue for the individuals' right to eat themselves while various health gurus will tout the nutritious value of selfmeat, which contains all that your body needs since it's made of the same stuff. This sort of cannibalism will become, if not generally accepted, then at least tolerated, with prohibition seen as unenforceable.

It's not much of a leap from self-cannibalism to offering your meat to dinner guests, and once people acquire a taste for other people, this can only lead to one thing: celebrity cannibalism.

C-level celebrities, unable to make any money in the crowded reality TV market, will turn to peddling their own flesh to pop-culture-obsessed gourmands. I think it's safe to augur that Kenny Rogers Roasters will start serving actual roasted Kenny Rogers and that an all-in-one George Foreman Grill/Meat Maker will let you grill up some George Foreman.

This turn of events will darken as unauthorized celebrity tissue samples find their way into the meat market. Big-name celebrities will be targeted, with stalkers and opportunists trying to steal medical biopsies from doctors or even samples directly from the source. In this black market of celebflesh, counterfeiters will flourish, leaving many celebrities torn between feeling violated by meat pirates and offended by being falsely portrayed as too stringy.

In time, these celebrities may find it wise to give into fan demands by offering up their officially licensed flesh as a gourmet alternative -- think "Newman's Own Meat". Increased pressure to perform gastronomically will lead to scandal over the common usage of "meat-synching" by celebrities of subpar flavor. There may even emerge a new kind of celebrity who's known only for how good he or she tastes, resulting in a generation of kids whose highest ambition in life is to be considered delicious.

Finally, the ultimate form of celebrity cannibalism may come from the Catholic Church. Using DNA lifted from the Shroud of Turin combined with cells from a donor, the blood and flesh of Christ may once and for all be substantiated without the need for wine and cracker intermediaries.

Update 2009-03-14: And it begins with George Clooney flavored tofu...

Lyle Zapato

Mind Reading Machine

Lyle Zapato | 2005-04-30.6810 LMT | Mind Control | NWO | General Paranoia

Now for sale on eBay: One temporally displaced Strauss Mind Reading Machine...

hello, i am selling what i believe to be a mind reading machine built by Dr. J. S. Strauss in the year 2282. After finding the time machine and the shrinking machine in my house i started to think what other stuff might be hidden away in my home. So i started searching from top to bottom and thats when i found the mind reading machine. It was hidden in a very tight corner of my attic and was wrapped in a old bed sheet, covered with dirt. With a wet paper towel it cleaned up very nice (see pictures).

The machine is made out of copper, metal, and plastic. Now, I wouldnt think that plastic would still be around in the year 2282, but i guess it still is. The mind reading machine does not work from what i could tell, but some one who knows electronics might be able to figure it out. I had my friend wear the head peice and i pushed on some buttons, but we just could not get it to work. We only know how to work on cars, this electronic stuff from the future is hard for us to understand, so thats why i am selling the mind reading machine....its why im selling off all of these inventions that i have found.

I believe the seller and his friend might be playing with forces they do not understand. The device pictured is not a normal mind reading machine as we understand them today. Conventional mind readers are used by the NWO and do not need to be physically attached to the thinker. What I believe he has is a part of a morphic field transmitter that is designed to upload a person's essential psychic patterns into the aether, allowing a copy of that person to exist separately on a higher dimensional brane.

Their fooling around with it might be filling up branic space with multiple copies of themselves! If Sheldrake is right, and undoubtedly he is, there could soon be a global pandemic of flannel, unkempt facial hair, and chunky glasses as their morphic resonance patterns begin to influence people's consciousness on a holonic level.

Lyle Zapato

Faraday Tents

Lyle Zapato | 2005-03-23.4210 LMT | Aluminum | Belgian Conspiracy | NWO
Faraday Tent and diagram

A helpful reader emailed to inform me of a company he learned about called Holland Shielding Systems B.V., makers of RF-shielded enclosures and tempest equipment. They have many types of Faraday cages*, including their "Faraday tents", shown on the right.

At first I thought that this might be a good source for paranoid computer accessories, but then I noticed something suspicious. Their main website's domain is faradaycages.com -- sure to be found by anyone in the market for a Faraday cage, and in fact shows up on top as a sponsored link on a Google search -- and they conspicuously claim in the masthead to be from the Netherlands. However, if you click on any subpage on the site the actual URL of the page is hidden via a frame. And what is the domain used by their subpages?

hollandshielding.be!

That's right, Holland Shielding Systems B.V. is really a front for the Belgian Conspiracy! Clearly they are trying to undermine paranoidal use of AFDB and related technology with Faraday cage disinformation.

It is a common myth that AFDBs are ineffective since they are not proper Faraday cages (i.e. not completely enclosing). While Faraday cage configurations are needed to shield standard RF transmissions -- their main application -- they are not needed for protection against psychotronic mind control, which is based on psychotronic energy, a highly modified form of electromagnetic energy that can interact with neural tissues much more effectively than standard EM and is deflected by certain substances, most notably aluminum. The deflective field of an AFDB more than overlaps the brain, protecting the user from all but targeted basal-orthogonal attacks with medium- to high-power psychotronic ray guns, which can be countered by lining one's shoes and pants seat with foil.

Please, don't be fooled by crypto-Belgians promising to replace your beanie with a tent of dubious efficacy for psychotronic use.

* Faraday cages are named in honor of Michael Faraday. Before going on to make a name for himself with dynamos and benzene, Faraday was an "assistant" to Humphry Davy, the man who exposed the arcane psychotronic secret of Aluminum to the general public in 1807. After Davy's treachery against the mind control elite (explained in page-padding detail in my book), the NWO arranged for a 20-year-old loyal Orderist named Faraday to become Davy's handler -- to watch over him while the NWO engaged in damage control -- by temporarily blinding Davy in an "accidental" laboratory explosion, thus forcing him to seek Faraday's assistance. This was a prelude to Davy's "knighthood" (i.e. the psychotronic reformatting of his brain) the following year.

Lyle Zapato

Lord Kelvin And Your Hard Drive

Lyle Zapato | 2005-02-27.2800 LMT | Kelviniana

Kelvin's "On the Electro-dynamic Qualities of Metals" describes his experiments with bits of nickel and iron that showed their electrical resistance changed depending on how they were oriented in a magnetic field.

What's so interesting about this 148 year old experiment? It marks the discovery of a phenomenon today known as anisotropic magnetoresistance (AMR) which is used by modern hard drives to read data. Just like in Kelvin's experiments, a hard drive's magnetoresistance (MR) read head changes its electrical resistance in response to magnetic fields, thus allowing the drive to read data from changes in the current being sent through the head as the head passes over the spinning magnetic platters.

The introduction of the MR read head (made of an alloy of nickel and iron -- the metals used in Kelvin's experiments,) allowed the explosion in hard drive sizes in the late '90s as they replaced the older, less-sensitive inductive read/write heads. (The original MR heads are now being replaced by even-more-sensitive giant magnetoresistive heads, which still contain an AMR element.)

So, the next time you look through your multi-gibioctet collection of MP3s, digicam snaps, and pirated episodes of American television shows, remember to thank the Lord Kelvin for giving you the ability to have greater areal density through the electro-dynamic wonder of anisotropic magnetoresistance.

Lyle Zapato

Victorian 3D Scientific Imaging

Lyle Zapato | 2005-02-08.0310 LMT | Kelviniana | Retro

Looking for some content for your iPod-Stereoscope? Here's an illustration from Lord Kelvin's 1894 paper "On Homogeneous Division of Space":


Stereoscopic photo of an orthic tetrakaidecahedron, constructed out of soldered wire.

Cross your eyes to see cutting-edge 19th century scientific imaging technology! I have exchanged the images left for right from the original since I find crossing my eyes easier than forcing them apart. The original presumably would have been viewed using a stereoscope, a common gizmo for the Victorian-era techno-hipster...

Victorian stereoscope advertisement, as filtered through Apple

Since it took an inordinate amount of time to make the above image, I'll have to put off retyping Kelvin's paper till later. It's an interesting one, with some nice illustrations of tessellations. Until then, busy yourself with making your own tetrakaidecahedra. See how many rooms of your house you can fill!

UPDATE: "On Homogeneous Division of Space" is online.

Lyle Zapato

Aluminum Superatoms

Lyle Zapato | 2005-01-23.1850 LMT | Aluminum

Aluminum-iodine superatom.

A research team has discovered that clusters of aluminum atoms can impersonate the chemical properties of single atoms of other elements. They have dubbed these clusters "superatoms." In experiments with polyiodides, they've found that a superatom of 13 aluminum atoms (Al13) behaves much like an iodine atom, while an Al14 superatom behaves more like an alkaline earth atom such as beryllium.

Joint head of the research, Shiv N. Khanna of Virginia Commonwealth University: "The flexibility of an Al13 cluster to act as an iodine atom shows that superatoms can have synthetic utility, providing an unexplored 'third dimension' to the traditional periodic table of elements. [...] Applications using Al13 clusters instead of iodine in polymers may lead to the development of improved conducting materials. Assembling Al13I units may provide aluminum materials that will not oxidize, and may help to overcome a major problem in fuels that burn aluminum particles."

ZPi Research Labs will be following this discovery for application in Superatomic AFDB (SAFDB) technology that may provide better corrosion protection for Cascadian users.

Lyle Zapato

Zaxon and Electrostatic Discharge Dangers

Lyle Zapato | 2005-01-10.9990 LMT | Miscellaneous | Paraterrestrials

Two sites not at all connected for your consideration:

"My Name Is Phil"
Can you keep a secret? Phil has lots of research on paraterrestrial transmissions, a map of portals, breaking news reports, a solution to the global energy crisis involving tree sap, and anecdotes and wisdom from his medieval alien friend Zaxon. He also has his own songs and music videos for download. Do check him out when you tire of monorails and Sasquatch.
The ESD Journal
Do you gas up your car wearing nothing but a fuzzy sweater and socks, all the while talking on your cellphone? Then it's vitally important you read the ESD Journal before you die in an explosion. Includes lots of links to ESD research and anti-static devices.

The ESD Journal also links to information on lipoatrophia semicircularis (LS), a medical disorder that could become the carpal tunnel syndrome of the 21st century. LS mainly afflicts computer-using office workers and consists of a semicircular zone of atrophy of the subcutaneous fatty tissue located mostly on the upper thighs. They hypothesize that it is caused by electrostatic discharge from contact with the undersides of metal desks. Fortunately LS seems to be reversible and 95% of retired employees have no more lesions after a year. While their hypothesis is compelling, I am somewhat troubled by the fact that LS is mainly reported in so-called "Belgians". Perhaps the condition is really the result of the cramped quarters inside Belgian Citizen Pods.

Tha Stinkin' Pirate

New Threat To Pirates

Tha Stinkin' Pirate | 2004-08-20.1000 LMT | Piratical Yarrings

Avast me hearties! Thar be ah new threat ta tha piratical life devised by ah ruddy crew of Dutch blaggards, an anti-pirate system called Secure-Ship. It be comprised o' ah series o' yardarms emanatin' from tha gunwale what carry metallic lines stowin' 9,000 volts o' 'lectricity, an' makes boardin' ah ship like tryin' ta wrestle 'lectric eels. Yer Jacob's ladder'll take on ah whole 'nother meanin' should ye lay yer daddles on this infernal riggin'! Many ah seadog o' mine has been scuppered whilst tryin' ta crib cargo pants from Gap freighters thus fitted. Be ye warned!

Lyle Zapato

Gmail, Kibioctets, And Introducing ZPiMail

Lyle Zapato | 2004-07-17.9400 LMT | Site | Metric System

Much has been made of Google's new email service, Gmail, which promises a gigabyte of free storage. Although true paranoids have already rejected the service for important reasons, many are excited at the idea of getting all that free storage space.

But will you really be getting as much as you think?

According to the Gmail FAQ, that 1 gigabyte is actually 1,000 megabytes (and presumably by megabyte they mean 1,000,000 bytes -- otherwise, this way madness lies). Consider: if the current mailbox on your computer is reported by your OS as having an even 100 megabytes in it, you might naively think you could store ten times that on a Gmail account. Unfortunately, you would be wrong by 48,576,000 bytes (about 46 megabytes by your OS's reckoning -- quite a lot of email).

This is the sort of confusion and sneaky business practices that results when the kibioctet standard is not in wide use, as it should be.

To address this issue, as well as others, ZPi is proud to announce ZPiMail. Unlike Gmail, ZPiMail offers infinite gibioctets of storage space by leveraging the transcendental irrationality of nature itself:

Every email you have stored can be expressed as a mere string of digits (in fact, it's already stored as such on your computer). Since the number π has an infinite number of essentially random digits, the string of digits that represents one of your emails can be found within it, as can the digits representing your entire mailbox, no matter how large it may be. Instead of storing all those gibioctets of digits on your computer, why not just store the offset of the expansion of π that matches them? With ZPiMail, now you can!

(NOTE: ZPi does not currently offer software to facilitate reading your email from π, however you can rest assured that everything in your mailbox is already safely stowed away in there, as well as any future email you may receive and hypothetical emails to you from Jimmy Carter explaining all the mysteries of universe in Farsi. I apologize for this oversight, but I have been forced to prematurely announce ZPiMail in order to head off my archnemesis, Dr. Ernesto, who is attempting to steal focus with his derivative EeMail.)